As I was perusing the books at a Barnes and Noble store just before Christmas, my eyes caught hold of a book entitled loneliness by John T. Cacioppo and William Patrick; Norton, 2008 (lack of captilization reflects the design of the book cover). To further connect with possible readers the jacket of the book displays a single large black dot in the midst of the ivory background color. One could mistake this for a bit of dirt or misplaced drop of ink deposited during its production or handling, but a quick look at the spine of the book jacket displays the same black dot.
Having a pastor's heart and always struggling with this state-of-being myself and seeing and hearing it in the lives of others. I quickly picked it up and started paging through the book. Soon I found the following:
"...social isolation has an impact on health comparable to the effect of high blood pressure, lack of exercise, obesity, or smoking" (p. 5).
I bought the book. I found it to be a good read, challenging, insightful, and down-to-earth helpful. My thirst for learning was more than quenched by the brief tours through neurophysiology (reviewing functions of different parts of the brain) and presentation of evolutionary thinking (important to the authors' arguments, but does not have to be swallowed whole to get much personally and professionally out of the book). At no place was I left with only theory without application to my personal and social life.
In the last chapter (p 247 ff), the authors underscored the importance of taking steps to become aware of loneliness and to take steps to use it as a driver toward making connections, building community.
"In 1985, when researchers asked a cross-section of the American people, 'How many confidants do you have?' the most common response to the question was three. In 2004, when researchers asked again, the most common response - made by twenty-five percent of the respondents - was none. One-quarter of these twenty-first century Americans said they had no one at all with whom to talk openly and intimately."
The authors also noted that research is suggesting that those who look to overcome loneliness by making connection online through their computer are ending up with a greater depth of loneliness. Other electronic tools the authors briefly mention include telephone and SimCity technologies.
That's the bad news. The good news from the authors is that there are those who today "adventitiously address human loneliness in each of the three dimensions - intimate, relational, and collective." Those the authors are crediting with this are Christian churches, specifically the megachurches mentioned of Schuller, Warren, and Osteen. "From education, to dating services, to daycare, to psychological and marital counseling, to basketball tournaments, they provide one-stop shopping for human connection in many different forms" (p. 254). The authors also acknowledge "all the faiths that have large numbers of adherents" (Confucianism, Buddhism, Islam, and Buddhism) have as a key the "human need for connection and social support."
Small churches were not included in the authors' discussion. I would guess that this was precluded by the parameters and focus of the book rather than an inference of the authors that less-than-megachurch churches do not address human loneliness.
Christ's call. Covenant. Vine and branches. For God so loved the world... The Church.
In 2009 how would you become aware of those - in the community in which you live AND in your church - who are not connected, who could be saved by your offering connection through invitation to be part of One and that which that One called into being as His tool for connecting - Christ's Church?
